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Archive through March 11, 2014

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Bra engineer.
Where can I train for this job??


Calvin Richardson, an engineer at the University of Tennessee, has designed a bra that keeps women's breast from jiggling, bouncing up and down, and stops nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in. After a news conference announcing the invention, a large group of men took Mr. Richardson outside and beat the **** out of him

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David-

Thank goodness for a large group of men. I bet it really upset his husband/wife.
 
Dave: Not yet, but I'm still in no hurry.
Our Post Office is now open 24/7, however we just have 2 hours in the morning and 2 hours in the afternoon when the "window's open" to buy stamps, get/send packages, etc. I'm ready to rate Congress on the basis of how well the USPS "serves" its "customers".
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Anybody watching the situation in Nevada with the BLM and the Bundy Family? Remember Ruby Ridge and Waco?
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I see that the 2nd ammendment still works in Utah.The BLM backed down and left .Interesting how Harry Reid is connected to the land grab for a Chineese solar power company that wants the land.Humm
 
Good People,
It’s all in how one says and or punctuates their sentences.

The boss has to lay off one person from his department and he's narrowed the choice down to Ann or Jack. First he invites Ann in.

The boss says "I have a problem, I have to lay you or Jack off."

She replies "You better jack off, I've got a headache"
=
 
Why I fired my secretary

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday."

I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... They will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office my secretary Jane said, "Good Morning Boss. And by the way, Happy Birthday! "
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday. What do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!"

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, "You know, It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office, do we?"

I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
She said, "Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner."

After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, " Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back."
"Ok," I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and after a couple of minutes she came out carrying a huge birthday cake, followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday".

And I just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.
 
New Species has evolved. Maybe Darwin was right after all!!

They are referred to as “homo slackass-erectus” created by natural genetic downward evolution through constant spineless posturing and spasmodic upper limb gestures, which new research has shown to
cause shorter legs and an inability to ambulate other than in an awkward shuffling gait.

The "drag-crotch" shape also seems to effect brain function. Expect no eye contact or intelligent verbal communication.

History shows that this species mostly receives food stamps and full government care.

Unfortunately most are highly fertile.

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I was in North Minneapolis a couple weeks ago, a guy was carrying 2 boxes of pizzas walked(waddled) across the street in front of us. When he got to his vehicle he turned and then I realized why he was waddling - he looked like the guy in David's picture. Way too much work to walk like that.
 
OK, here's what you have been waiting for. Still haven't figured what was done to this song was a sin or a beautiful thing. A.

You can't beat a good Roy Orbison song when it's done well.

Don't ya just love Roy Orbison!

My friend watched it 4 times.

Brilliant photography and great street scenes. Watch out for the black Cat!

If you like Roy Orbison you’ll love this one.

If you don't like Roy Orbison you will still love this one…



http://player.vimeo.com/video/6779174?title=0&byline=0&portrait=0&autoplay=1
 
look a big coconut !with the correct fluid added it could be fun.

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